Versions of Home Long Dead
Nov. 23rd, 2019 07:43 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dewlineSeanan McGuire made a point about the versions of "Home" we keep on carrying with us, no matter what other people said about and did to those versions back when they actually existed physically.
There were things about living out west that I hated and feared. That I was glad to be away from when I moved here to Ottawa-Gatineau. There are things that I was and still am glad to have found when I got here. I didn't go through gentrification (yet), and my city may be less hard-hit by climate derangement during the rest of my lifetime than other parts of this planet.
But I realize now that it still hurt that I felt that I had to leave in the first place. Being able to fly away to a place that felt like it was going to be healthier for me...and was and still is, in several ways...doesn't detract from that hurt.
There were things about living out west that I hated and feared. That I was glad to be away from when I moved here to Ottawa-Gatineau. There are things that I was and still am glad to have found when I got here. I didn't go through gentrification (yet), and my city may be less hard-hit by climate derangement during the rest of my lifetime than other parts of this planet.
But I realize now that it still hurt that I felt that I had to leave in the first place. Being able to fly away to a place that felt like it was going to be healthier for me...and was and still is, in several ways...doesn't detract from that hurt.